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Diary of a CEO · 2022-05-23 · 1h 35m

Simon Sinek: The Number One Reason Why You’re Not Succeeding | E145

Simon Sinek explains why purpose comes from serving others, and why fulfillment, leadership, and honesty all start with sacrifice.

Simon Sinek: The Number One Reason Why You’re Not Succeeding | E145
The guest

Simon Sinek — Best-selling author of Start With Why and The Infinite Game, leadership thinker, and founder of the Optimism Press imprint with Penguin Random House.

The gist

Simon Sinek joins Steven Bartlett to discuss how losing his passion for work drove him to discover his 'why,' and why selfish, finite goals leave high achievers (athletes, executives, performers) feeling empty. He argues that joy, fulfillment, and purpose come from serving others, sacrificing for them, and being willing to ask for help. The conversation explores self-awareness and blind spots, the skill of having uncomfortable conversations, peer-review feedback systems, lying and 'ethical fading' inside organizations, and what Gen Z and remote work mean for company culture. Sinek closes by reframing Bartlett's podcast around its real cause (helping people tell the truth) and candidly admits he has ADHD and barely reads books despite having written several.

Big reveals

  • Sinek reveals he was living the 'American dream' but had lost his passion for work and was faking being happier and more successful than he felt.
  • Champions like Michael Phelps and Andre Agassi often crash into depression because they built their lives around selfish finite goals that then run out.
  • After being told he was a bad listener, Sinek took a listening class and learned he's brilliant with strangers but 'appalling' with friends and family.
  • The Army Rangers have required peer review for 40 years to catch 'spotlight Rangers' who perform when watched but slack off in the barracks.
  • Sinek explains 'ethical fading,' where pressure to hit short-term goals leads good people to make deeply unethical-but-legal decisions.
  • Bartlett admits his podcast started partly to grow his personal brand, and Sinek reframes its true purpose as helping people tell the truth.
  • Sinek confesses he has severe ADHD, has 'written more books than I've read,' and learns by listening and asking questions, not reading.
  • Sinek reveals he started his own imprint, Optimism Press, with Penguin Random House to publish ideas that advance his cause.

Things worth remembering

  • Sinek says a person's 'why' is fully formed by their mid-to-late teens; the youngest 'why discovery' he ran was for a 16-year-old.
  • Team-sport athletes rarely suffer the post-success depression that individual athletes do because they achieved together.
  • Hall of Fame NFL player Curtis Martin played to build a platform to give back, so he wasn't lost when he retired.
  • Sinek argues we build trust by asking for help, not by offering it, because asking is the vulnerable act.
  • The 'tree of monkeys': those at the top looking down see only smiles, while those at the bottom looking up see the opposite.
  • Sinek challenges listeners to tell zero lies for 48 hours to expose how many little white lies we tell daily.
  • Henry Ford reportedly said if he'd asked people what they wanted, they'd have said a faster horse.
  • Sinek argues iTunes, more than the iPod, revolutionized music by shifting culture from albums to songs.
  • Sinek says some famous authors game bestseller lists by buying their own books across the country to hit number one.
  • Sinek finished The Da Vinci Code because its very short chapters suited his attention span.

Recommended in this episode

Books, products and media the guest or host genuinely endorsed here — with the buy link.

Affiliate link — we may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.

Guest’s ownBook

Start With Why

Simon Sinek

“Simon, my introduction to you was this book Start With Why and it hung on the walls of some of my offices around the world for a long time” — Steven Bartlett 00:01:01
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

How to Make a Plant Love You

Optimism Press (Simon Sinek imprint)

“we've published four books so far... How to Make a Plant Love You, uh Trust First, um The Power of Giving Away Power, and our newest one is called Partnering” — guest 01:21:00
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

Trust First

Optimism Press (Simon Sinek imprint)

“we've published four books so far... How to Make a Plant Love You, uh Trust First, um The Power of Giving Away Power, and our newest one is called Partnering” — guest 01:21:00
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

The Power of Giving Away Power

Optimism Press (Simon Sinek imprint)

“we've published four books so far... How to Make a Plant Love You, uh Trust First, um The Power of Giving Away Power, and our newest one is called Partnering” — guest 01:21:00
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

Partnering

Optimism Press (Simon Sinek imprint)

“and our newest one is called Partnering. Um and they all have a point of view about how to move or new ideas about how to advance this” — guest 01:21:00
Find it on Amazon
RecommendedBook

The Da Vinci Code

Dan Brown (inferred)

“There's a couple books I finished. Um I finished The Da Vinci Code. It's so good. And it's You know why? Cuz it's written with really short chapters” — guest 01:27:14
Find it on Amazon